Practising Meditation

A warm Hello to everyone here

As I look back over the years that I have been practising meditation, I realise how much the dictum 'Know thyself' has ruled my life. I started meditation with the expectation that I would travel to unknown realms of consciousness and pleasure, experience curious and interesting states, end up a better person and, quite possibly, be utterly transformed beyond my wildest dreams. The nature of this supposed transformation was that somehow, someway, I would obtain a transcendent knowledge; I'd not only 'know myself' but I'd know life, the universe and everything.

Well, that hasn't happened so far. I tried different styles and techniques of meditation hoping to find the 'best' and 'truest' from; a technique that would be my ticket to the 'absolute'. But a number of questions started to crop up when the goods weren't delivered. (Maybe the Postman didn't ring twice). Maybe the 'problem' lay with the meditative technique, or was it with me? I began to consider how useful, or even accurate, such concepts as 'the absolute', 'knowledge' and 'transformation' were. I asked myself questions: 'What exactly is the ground or context I am operating in? Why do I meditate? What do I want?' I tried to answer my questions in terms of desire: 'I want security', but it was some transcendental security, some absolute guarantee that I'd be OK, that I'd be protected and that all would go well with me always. Looked at this way, meditation was my way of building a protective wall against life - not through a direct negation but by finding a means to bypass and overarch life and stay ahead of its game. It was like an insurance policy. In these terms I didn't want to be a cosmic sucker, a palooka amongst the 'enlightened'.

The concept of 'enlightened' is, on one level, an outing of the superego in an extreme form of image - it represents the dark side of the hero, the nightmare of delusion inflated by the dreams of absolute power. I experienced a deep longing, perhaps the index of an inner absence, an unacknowledged emptiness - and perhaps even a refusal of some kind. A refusal to give myself up, to surrender my boundaries - if I wanted 'enlightenment' I wanted it for me, for my security. To put it another way I wanted to get out of the game of life by winning it as quickly as possible. Well, that wasn't possible and perhaps isn't even a possibility.

So there seemed to be no solution except to try and accept each moment in its particular configuration and to accept my existential 'buzz' as a part of that configuration. It would also be possible to accept myself as I was, with some humour and compassion and to actually enjoy being this sensing, feeling, thinking being without having to do all this terrible hard work of 'knowing myself'. To put it another way, pain is always a possibility and perfection is a myth.

Be Well
Elrick

I went through many similar experiences with meditation, i traveled to different places, and had a Wonderful time through these experiences. I also learned that the best technique for any knowledge gained is through our own experiences, and our Intuitive Guidance. The techniques for Meditation are there to lay the foundation, i myself have experienced more Inner peace when i was meditating, i am feeling drawn to start Meditation practices once again. This time with the knowledge i have gained through past experiences, i realize i have the tools to Meditate in any way i feel comfortable, and just be. With practice i hope to find more Inner Peace so i may make better decisions in Life.

Many Blessings

Elrick welcome to the true mystic experience. And most people get to where you are at and then quit. Yogis call it "the void", mystics call it the" dark night of the soul", Psalms 23 calls it "the shadow of the valley of death." And it is all of those things . One knows that they are well on their way when that part of the experience comes up and bites one. Yepper

love,

sun